mayora 13

there's not enough mayonnaise on this!!!

If the favicon of the kewpie mayonnaise bottle didn't give it away, then you must not be familiar with Hijikata's one true love. The one thing that Hijikata would put before the city of Edo, the Shinsengumi, and perhaps even himself: mayonnaise. If there's a character in the vast land of JUMP who's earned the title "mayora", it's certainly Hijikata Toshirou, otherwise known as The Soldier of Love: Mayora 13.

As Sorachi states lovingly in Volume 6 of the manga, while talking about Hijikata's original character design, "I won't butcher Hijikata's character. I'll just do it through mayonnaise." Well that's exactly what this section is out to do. Ruin Hijikata's character through mayonnaise. Get ready for the Hijikata Special!

but first, a little mayo history.

Hijikata's bottle of mayonnaise may or may not be familiar to most western mayonnaise-eaters. That's because the first and most prominent brand of mayonnaise in Japan is Kewpie Mayonnaise. It was first introduced in 1925, and since then has become a staple condiment in Japanese households. According to the official kewpie website, many use it to season their meat, fish, or as a dressing for their salads. In the case of Hijikata, he uses it on just about everything. Japanese mayonnaise is made with apple cider vinegar, or rice vinegar, and uses a small amount of MSG. It's a bit thinner and less gloopy/jiggly than western mayonnaise: think about the consistency of mustard when it comes out of a squeeze bottle.

Amazingly enough, mayonnaise meals are not exactly a rarity in Japan either, which may not come as a surprise to you taking into consideration Gintama's plethora of parodies and pop culture references. Among a select few Japanese youth are mayonnaise fanatics who also call themselves "mayora" (most likely what Hijikata's nickname references), and they too will eat mayonnaise on top of everything and anything--or even straight from the bottle! In fact, there's even a restaurant in Tokyo called Mayonnaise Kitchen that offers a variety of foods (both Japanese and Western) which are't the least bit shy of a good amount of mayonnaise in every dish. Mayonnaise Kitchen also offers a bottle-keeping service for their regular customers, which they are encouraged to personalize as seen to the right.

mayonnaise in gintama

As Hijikata is a hardcore mayora, there is no shortage of mayonnaise scenes in Gintama. As a matter of fact, mayonnaise probably makes an appearance more often than some of the story's most popular characters. I have undertaken the heavy burden job of investigating a good number of mayonnaise sightings in Gintama, all of which of course, involve Hijikata.

EPISODE 20: There's not enough mayonnaise!!!
Hijikata interrupts a Shinsengumi ghost story get-together after claiming his Yakisoba "doesn't have enough mayonnaise on it". Much to his dismay, he finds that they're fresh out and scolds the group for not stocking up on the condiment. Later on in the episode, he jumps head first into a giant pot to hide from a ghost. When Okita questions this hiding spot he uses the excuse, "I'm looking for the entrance to the Kingdom of Mayonnaise".

EPISODE 27: It's amazing how you can make a katsudon into dog food.
At the restaurant Battle Royale Host, Hijikata treats sugar-lover Gintoki and Okita to his "Katsudon Hijikata Special". Gintoki attempts to return it for a chocolate parfait.

EPISODE 35: Toshi? Who's that? I am the warrior of love, Mayora 13.
While Matsudaira and the Shinsengumi work to apprehend the new boyfriend of Matsudaira's daughter, Hijikata reflects over lost romances where women rejected him because of his love of mayonnaise. (Specifically, Tea-covered rice, the Hijikata Special.)

Touched by the couple's romance, Hijikata works against his comrades and calls them out for interfering in other people's love lives. He dubs himself Mayora 13 and shoots down Matsudaira and the Shinsengumi's helicopter with a giant mayonnaise canon, before wishing the couple a happy life together.

EPISODE 48: My dish was created by a guy who was too lazy to eat mayonnaise and rice seperately.
During a day off of work, Hijikata runs into Gintoki at a restaurant, who's eating his dish with sweet beans piled on top! When the argument gets heated over whose meal is more disgusting, Hijikata defends mayonnaise with, "Don't you know that something different that makes the dish stand out is essential? By adding something salty and sour, the flavor of each ingredient stands out more. Basically, that's what mayo does."

EPISODE 50: Cover the plate further with mayonnaise and you're done!
Entering their second year on air, the cast of Gintama deliberates about what should be done to further the show and keep good ratings. When Shinpachi and Kagura tell Hijikata that lack of improvement on the show will mean that he isn't "able to suck on his beloved mayonnaise", Hijikata quickly proposes the "World Gintama Cooking Show". In which he covers a plate with mayonnaise, and then tops it with... more mayonnaise.

Later on in the episode, he can be seen snorting mayonnaise after Okita proposes a "Ring" like idea for the anime.

EPISODE 86: It's a flavor of the IT order.
The Mitsuba Arc shows a younger Shinsengumi having lunch with Mitsuba (Okita's sister and probably the only love interest of Hijikata's mentioned outside of mayonnaise), in which Mitsuba pours chili powder on top of her meal. As Kondo protests, he turns to his right to see Hijikata pouring mayonnaise on top of his.

EPISODE 114: I'll die if I stay on Earth too long, mayo.
Hijikata is once again assigned to get rid the "boyfriends" of Matsudaira's daughter, Kuriko. However, when Kuriko recognizes him as "Mayora 13", he ends up deflecting the passes of the other men by claiming her as his own and whisks her away!

In an attempt to ditch her on his own however, Hijikata makes all sorts of attempts to gross her out: acting cowardly in a fight, bringing her to a theater to watch a porn flick, and even letting her try the infamous Hijikata Special. Much to his avail, she actually enjoys it-- and as a last resort, Hijikata and the Yorozuya dress up as visitors from the planet Mayo Maniac, in which of course, Hijikata is the prince.

EPISODE 160: The infamous mayonnaise lighter.
The lighter makes it's appearance earlier in the series (though exactly where is kind of lost on me at the moment, since as you can see, mayonnaise is in almost every damn episode). Hijikata's love for mayonnaise knows no bounds as it even extends into his accessories. I'm waiting for the mayonnaise boxers, Sorachi!!

EPISODE 166: Mayonnaise is an all-mighty universal condiment that goes on everything and anything!
While handcuffed to Gintoki (by Okita, who latches their second hands together and slips mayonnaise into Hijikata's pocket), Hijikata pours mayonnaise into his coffee. He also does Gintoki a favor by squeezing some into his parfait. Unfortunately for both of them, Okita laced the mayonnaise with laxatives.

EPISODE 185: Amendment 25 to bureau policy requires each person to consume 5 bottles of mayonnaise a day!
Mayorin Mayonnaise officially announces that people who find the golden ticket in their bottle of mayonnaise can come on a trip to Mayorin's home, the mayonnaise factory. Determined to visit mayonnaise paradise, Hijikata makes an amendment to the Shinsengumi regulations and requires each member to utilize mayonnaise in their everyday lives so that he can acquire one of the coveted golden tickets.

EPISODE 190: Forgve him! He's not used to this! He thinks that everyone in the world loves mayonnaise!
Gintoki, Cat-sura and Kondo (in their feline/gorilla forms) run into Hijikata huffing and sipping on a bottle of mayonnaise. While initially he teases them by eating in front of them, he later (much to everyone's dismay) decides to share and squirts the rest of the bottle for the trio of animals to feast on.

ENDING 10: This world is yours by Plingmin
Hijikata is featured relaxing on the beach with a bottle of mayonnaise, and a full box of mayonnaise next to him for backup. Despite the fact that his comrades are behind him posing in speedos and attempting to take his life, Hijikata seems not to have a care in the world so long as his beloved is sitting next to him.

Naturally, I don't have time to re-watch nor re-read all of Gintama to spot mayonnaise sightings, so this is a work in progress! But that doesn't mean you can't help! Refresh my memory by shooting me an e-mail with the chapter/episode that features Hijikata and his beloved mayonnaise, and I'll add it to this list.